


Everybody Needs a Friend

by sinon



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Depression, Draco is tired, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hermione is too good for this world, Suicide, Time Travel, Voldemort doesn't exist and there is no war, he needs a hug and probably some food too, major character death except not really
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-07
Updated: 2016-11-29
Packaged: 2018-08-13 14:24:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7979947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinon/pseuds/sinon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Three months into their 6th year Draco Malfoy commits suicide.</p><p>The whole school will swear they had no idea he was depressed.</p><p>Hermione Granger will call them all liars.</p><p>-</p><p>A story where Hermione goes back in time to save Draco from himself, and falls in love along the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The news comes over dinner. Hermione is sitting with Harry and Ron, promptly not listening to them go on about the Chudley Cannons.

"I'm telling you mate, this is their season!" Ron says as he settles himself further into his seat.

"What makes you so sure?" Harry asks, pouring himself some juice.

Ron leans over the table, almost spilling the mashed potatoes. "I just know it!"

"If I could have everyone's attention," The headmaster is up at the podium looking grim. 

Hermione shares a look with Harry and Ron, who both shrug their shoulders in response.

"It has been brought to my attention that a student has passed away."

Like a hurricane, whispers breakout across the hall. Hermione can hear whispers of ‘Who do you think it can be?, ‘I totally knew something was off,’ and the like before she snaps her attention in front of her.

Hermione feels her stomach drop.

No.

She worryingly glances down the Slytherin table.

Where is he?

She searches across the table, looking for a sign of platinum blonde hair. She doesn't find it.

"Draco..." She whispers.

Everyone around her turns to look at her

"You okay?"

"Malfoy's not at his table."

They all turn to look at the table and sure enough, it hadn't just been her imagination he really isn't there.

"Before rumors spread," the headmaster continues as if he hadn't been interrupted. "I would like to say that yes it was young mister Malfoy who has now passed. There will be a memorial service this coming Sunday for those of you who would like to attend. That is all."

Hermione can't believe it. She had just spoken to him two days ago. He had seemed fine.

No. Actually, Hermione was lying. He hadn't seemed fine, he hadn't _seemed_ fine since they got to Hogwarts.

He'd seemed depressed.

God, how could she have been so stupid. He hadn’t been very good at hiding it. He had seemed paler, thinner, and had even quit the Quidditch team. He had told her and the rest of them, in his own way, that he was suffering. He had practically cried out for help.

And she, she chokes on a sob, she had done nothing.

She had known he was hurting, maybe she hadn’t realized it but now that she looked back, she had known.

"Hermione are you-"

She's out of her seat, running to the girls room before Harry can finish his sentence. 

She’s dry heaving over a toilet when Harry and Ron burst into the girls room.

“‘Mione…”

“I’m fine,” she says as the little that she did eat goes down the drain. “I’m okay, I just… felt sick.”

“I can see why,” Ron says, leaning against a sink. “I mean Malfoy, really? I never liked the bloke but I never wanted him to die, you know?”

Hermione felt anger rise to her throat. Ron had said several times that Malfoy could die in a pit for all he cared. She calmed herself down enough to get up and leave the stall.

Ron continues. “Although... he was a nasty ferret and he did bully the younger students. I wonder if anyone will even show up to his memorial.”

Hermione glares at him through the mirror. 

“That’s a bit harsh mate,” Harry says, before Hermione can say anything. 

Ron shrugs and takes a bite out of an apple that he took from the dining hall. “It’s the truth, though.”

“How could you…” Hermione is practically shaking with rage. Someone had died-- Malfoy had died and Ron didn’t seem to have a care in the world.

“Maybe you should lie down ‘Mione,” Harry says.

She suddenly feels weak. “Yeah, perhaps you’re right.”

He grabs a hold of her arm and leads her to the Gryffindor tower, where she does just that.

-

Sunday comes all too soon. 

Hermione wakes up with a headache that she has come to expect over the last couple of days. The sun blinds her through the sliver in the curtains and she can’t help but think that it’s mocking her; of course it would be a bright sunny day during Draco Malfoy’s memorial service. 

For all he was worth his weight in gold, the sun reminded everyone that the world didn’t care about one loss, it would continue to go on happily whether or not he was there.

Maybe Malfoy had finally gotten one right, maybe it was time to move on from this world.

The news had spread around the school the day after the announcement that it had been a suicide. The story went that Goyle had found Malfoy in the tub, wrists slit, covered in blood, and completely still. 

Hermione cursed herself for wanting it to be a homicide. At least then she could get rid of the guilt that was eating away at her.

Her dorm mates are still asleep when she is done getting ready. She isn’t surprised that they chose to sleep in, but a part of her is disappointed and saddened by their sleeping figures.

Harry and Ginny are waiting for her by the door when she goes down into the common room.

“Ready?” Ginny asks, giving her a sad smile. She feels her eyes water when she notices they are the only three here.

“Yeah.”  
-

When they get to the Great Hall, Hermione feels her eyes water again.

While there are plenty of Slytherins in attendance, there aren’t many other students from the other houses.

There is a group of Hufflepuffs huddled together on the left, a couple of Ravenclaws here and there, some young Gryffindor girls near the front, and as she looks closer, Luna and Neville near the back.

Hermione moves to sit in the middle.

The ceremony isn't very long. A priest goes up to the podium and says a few verses from the bible and tells a few stories of life and death, then a couple of Professors say a few words about his academic success before leaving. It is all very impersonal, very depressing. By the time it is over, Hermione feels sick to her stomach.

As she looks around she realizes that this is all the students of Hogwarts thought Malfoy deserved. Just a plain priest and a couple of sad students.

This wasn’t right. When someone died, people were supposed to _hurt_. 

People were supposed to cry and scream and rave on about how it wasn’t _fair_ to take away someone so young. How they couldn’t just take them and leave everyone in pain. But no one here cared enough for him did they?

She looks at Pansy, who had probably been the closest to him of them all, and all she sees are a couple of tears sliding down her cheeks. 

Was that is? Was that all Draco had meant to her? 

This wasn’t right!

Hermione shakes her head and gets up, feeling herself fill with anger. If no one was going to scream and cry and _care_ about Draco Malfoy, then she was. 

She was out the door before Harry or Ginny could stop her. She didn’t know what to do so as always, she marched toward her head of house’s classroom.

“Miss Granger what’s with all the fuss,” Professor Mcgonagall says calmly from behind her desk.

“Draco Malfoy isn’t dead. I refuse to accept it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This idea came to me and wouldn't let me think of anything else.
> 
> Dramione is so near and dear to my heart I hope I do them justice.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter right off the bat bc why not.

Professor Mcgonagall puts down her quill and regards Hermione’s aggressive stance.

“I’m afraid,” She begins. “That whether or not you accept it will do nothing seeing as how Mister Malfoy is, in fact, dead.”

Hermione feels her hands begin to shake. “No, he isn’t.”

“Miss Granger are you... alright?”

Hermione can feel the rage melt away. “I… I could have helped him.”

“Helped who?”

“Malfoy.”

Mcgonagall sighs. “Miss Granger, I can assure you that there was nothing you could have done-”

“No!” Hermione exclaims. “He talked to me, he told me he wasn’t okay… I could have _helped_ him.”

“You had no way of knowing-”

“I noticed when he grew paler, I noticed when the bags under his eyes grew darker and when his glare grew duller, I noticed when he stopped eating, hell he quit Quidditch, Professor, he _loved_ Quidditch, I knew it was a cry for help.” She starts pacing, feeling more guilty with every breath she takes. “And… And I ignored it.”

“It wasn’t your job to help him.”

“Maybe not,” she says softly. “But it was the right thing to do.”

“I’m sorry, Miss Granger.”

“Isn’t there anything we can do?” She looks at her Professor, who she has come to see as more of a parent than a teacher, with hope.

“I’m afraid not…”

“There might be one way,” They both turn to look at the Headmaster, who has just come in through the door. “One way that you could save Mister Malfoy.”

“Albus, surely you don’t mean-” She cuts herself off. “It’s dangerous, it could change everything!”

“Minerva, do you not trust Miss Granger?”

Mcgonagall purses her lips and looks between the two of them.

“Of course I do,”

“Then we must give Miss Granger the choice, don’t you think?”

“What choice?” Hermione asks, thoroughly confused.

Professor Dumbledore turns to give her a twinkling smile. “There is one way that you could save the young Malfoy, but it is very dangerous.”

“How so?”

“Messing with the past can be a very dangerous thing, Miss Granger.”

Hermione takes in a hopeful breath. “The past, you don’t mean to use… a timeturner?”

Dumbledore gives a small laugh. “Not exactly, but something along those lines. There is a spell-”

“An ancient spell that hasn’t been cast in hundreds of years and for good reason too,” Mcgonagall adds with a slight glare as if she knowing Dumbledore wouldn’t mention it.

“Yes, yes, an ancient spell that can be used to transport you into the place of your past self,”

“My past self?” Hermione says to herself. “I would be able to stop Draco from hurting himself?”

“That is the idea,” Dumbledore says.

Mcgonagall gets up from her seat and comes to stand by Dumbledore. “But you must know Miss Granger that changing the past can have dastardly effects on the future, a simple wrong decision can cause a war or something even worse. There is also the chance that Draco will still end up where he is.” She says the last part softly.

“But I have to try.”

Dumbledore smiles at the resolve in her eyes. “Yes, Miss Granger, you have to try.”

-

“How exactly does this spell work?” Hermione asks, looking warily at Professor Dumbledore, Mcgonagall, Snape and Pomfrey, who are looking down at her. 

“How this works,” Snape begins, pouring some foul concoction into a cup. “Is you will drink this potion, the Headmaster will cast the spell and you will be teleported back in time.”

“We are aiming for the start of this school year, but you must keep in mind that this spell has not been cast in a long time. The reason, besides the obvious answer of not messing with the past, is because there were times where the person was teleported way before they were meant to. They were teleported weeks or even years before the caster intended.”

Mcgonagall continues for him. “This can be bad because the spell cannot be broken and will only be done when the original reason for going back has either been changed or has occurred, the reason for this spell being Mister Malfoy’s death. So if you are teleported before this year, you will have to wait it out.”

Hermione feels dread build up in the pit of her stomach.

“Do you think you can handle that, Miss Granger?” Snape asks. “This is your last chance to back out and live your life as you normally would.”

But it shouldn’t be normal, should it? Not when someone has died.

“I can do this,” She replies. “I’m the only one that can.” The only one that would.

“Very well then if you are ready, drink this.”

She hears Dumbledore say a series of complicated spells but feels her vision start to blur.

“Oh and one more thing,” Snape says, sounding far away. “Do not, under any circumstances, tell anyone that you come from the future.”

-

She wakes up to a nudge on her arm.

“‘Mione wake up, we’re here.”

“What…” she opens her eyes to see Ron and Harry looking at her. She's in the train? But why?

The spell.

“What day is it?” She says, suddenly wide awake. “Month, year?

“September 3rd, 1996...” Ron says, warily.

Hermione’s grin is probably too wide but she doesn't care, the spell worked! 

“You okay, Hermione?” Harry asks.

“I’m fine,” She tells him, she was going to be fine and if she had anything to say about it, and she did, so would Malfoy.

When they are finally seated in the Great Hall, Hermione tunes out Professor Dumbledore and instead looks for Malfoy.

She remembers that she had looked for him in the past too, she remembers seeing him quietly sit there not really seeing anything around him.

He was much the same now.

If she was going to help him, she needed to have the first encounter that she had had back then too. They would run into each other in the Library tomorrow. Hermione would be there and she would be ready.

When the food appears before her, she actually has an appetite.

-

Hermione does her best to make sure the first day of classes is the same as it had been before. She raises her hand and takes notes when she had before, she even doodles the same cat to the right of her parchment.

This all lead up to her wanting to get a head start on her reading and going to the library. 

She finds him where she had before, hunched over a book at a table in the back of the library.

She looks at the book in her hand and remembers what had gotten his attention. She drops it.

“As clumsy as ever, I see,” comes the smooth drawl that she had expected.

She takes a moment to think of what to say. She had told him to shut it, but she wasn’t going to say that now.

“What are you reading?” She asks instead.

Malfoy seems surprised at her sudden interest. He scowls when he realizes he’s been staring. “None of your business.”

“I was just curious,” Hermione smiles. “I just came to get the new Charm’s book we need for our report.”

“I don’t care what you’re here for-”

“It’s never too early to start on an assignment, you know?” She continues as if he hadn’t interrupted her. “With all the work we’re going to be assigned it hardly even feels like I’m doing anything in advance.”

Malfoy seems to lose his defensiveness as she continues to talk.

“I never realized how nice and quiet it was back here,”

Malfoy rolls his eyes softly, “It’s a library, Granger, everywhere is ‘nice and quiet’ although not anywhere near you seeing as you refuse to shut your mouth.”

Whereas past Hermione would have snapped and walked away by now, future Hermione knew better. “Perhaps I am a bit chatty tonight.”

She goes to pull out the chair across from him. 

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“Sitting?”

“Not here you’re not.”

“Oh come on Malfoy, “She rolls her eyes. “You don’t own this chair and besides, you’re not even using it.”

Malfoy seems to lose the fight in him. “Fine just… be quiet.”

“Okay,”She says softly and begins to read quietly.

It’s an hour before any of them move.

Malfoy shuts his book and begins to pack up all his stuff.

“Good night Malfoy,” Hermione says softly from behind the pages of her book. 

Malfoy grunts in response but doesn’t say anything before walking away.

She sees a drop fall onto her paper and reaches up to wipe away her tear. She lets out a shaky sigh and slumps into her seat. 

To think that Malfoy, who was sitting in front of her a minute ago, so real and _alive_ , was going to kill himself in a little over three months was just unbelievable to her.

But it was unbelievable, because it had happened. It would still happen if she didn’t do something.

She suddenly came to the realization that she had no idea what to do. Except she did have a tiny idea of what to do. Draco Malfoy needed someone to care for him, Draco Malfoy needed a friend. She was determined to be that friend. 

She would do it, she had too, for both of their sakes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If Hermione seems ooc pls know that she is purposefully changing her responses in order to not scare Draco away.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter!

She gets up the next morning with a new resolve. She had decided last night that her and Malfoy were going to be friends. She knew it was going to be tricky, but she had never shied away from a challenge and she wasn’t about to start now.

“Going to breakfast?” Ginny asks from her seat by the fire, when she goes down into the common room.

“Oh, good morning Ginny,” Hermione says. “Yes I am, care to join me?”

Ginny smiles and nods. 

“Harry and Ron still asleep?” She asks Ginny on their way to the Great Hall.

“You know how those boys are, always sleeping in.”

Hermione laughs in agreement.

As soon as they enter the great hall her eyes land on the Slytherin table. She knew Draco wouldn’t be there, but she had hoped that their chat last night may have changed that.

“You okay, Hermione?”

Hermione gives her a smile. “Yes, yes I’m fine. Perhaps I’m not fully awake yet.”

“You’d think, with it being the first day, more people would be here early,” Ginny says gesturing to the empty spaces in all four tables. “They must be dreading the start of classes.”

“A new school year is exciting Gin,” Hermione tells her.

Ginny makes a face. “What I wouldn’t give to have a few more weeks of rest and relaxation.”

“Too much of a good thing can be bad,” Hermione says, pouring herself a glass of orange juice.

“There’s never too much of sleeping and shopping, Hermione,” Ginny grins cheekily.

Hermione rolls her eyes, but doesn’t argue.

-

She has double potions first. Double potions with Draco Malfoy.

As before Harry and Ron sit together, but instead of sitting in the empty desk in front of them, she goes to sit next to Malfoy.

“Just what do you think you’re doing?” Malfoy asks her as she begins to pull out her parchment and a quill.

“Sitting,” She tells him.

“Here?”

She looks over at him and gives him a small smile. “Yes.”

“Why?” He sounds thoroughly confused.

“Because,” She says. “It makes more sense to sit with a partner than to sit in an empty table. Besides, if there ever is partner work one of us will have to move anyway. This saves us both the trouble.”

Malfoy looks at her suspiciously but doesn’t argue her logic.

Hermione breathes out a sigh of relief. She hadn’t thought he would buy it so easily.

“You better not mess my potion up.”

Hermione rolls her eyes. “I’m not incompetent, Malfoy.”

“With all the time you’ve spent with the Weasel over break, no doubt, I fear that his incompetence may have rubbed off on you.”

Hermione raises her brow and feels her irritation grow. But instead of telling him to shove off, she just dips her quill into her ink and begins to take notes.

-

She knows not to expect Malfoy at dinner, but she is disappointed nonetheless. She can’t help but wonder if Malfoy really is starving himself. She knows he will get thinner, but just how little was he eating?

“You’ve got that look on your face.”

She snaps out of her thoughts and turns to look at Ron. “What look?”

“You know _that_ look,” Ron says gesturing toward her face with his fork. “That mother hen look you get when you’re about to nag us about our reports or if we’ve made our beds or something else equally annoying.”

Hermione frowns. “I wasn’t aware I had a look.”

“You definitely have a look,” Harry says. When Hermione’s frown deepens he continues hastily. “It’s not bad look! It’s… It’s reassuring.”

“It reminds me of my Mum,” Ron says, biting his chicken. “It’s creepy.”

Hermione is suddenly furious. “Well sorry if it’s creepy that I care.”

“Hermione-”

“Wait ‘Mione-”

-

The _nerve_ of those two. Hermione has enough on her plate without having to deal with them insulting her too. So she likes to remind them to get things done? She is their friend! It’s only right that she cares about their studies and general well being. But no, they said she was nagging!

So caught up into her own thoughts, she can’t stop herself from crashing into someone when she turns the corner.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! I wasn’t…” She trails off when she realizes that it’s Malfoy.

“Watch where you’re going,” Malfoy tells her, his face and voice void of its usual sneer. He goes to move around her, but something in Hermione tells her to not let him go, not like this.

“Malfoy, wait.”

He turns to look at her and she see’s his eyes are red and puffy. He’s been crying. She feels her stomach sink and worry flare in her chest. She tries to think of something to say, but her mind draws a blank. Something, anything, she needs to stall him.

“You’re shoes are nice,” She says out of panic.

Malfoy looks confused. “My… My shoes?”

Hermione wants to slap herself. His shoes! That’s the best she can come up with?

“Yes, they’re very nice,” She nods, deciding to just go along with it. 

Malfoy looks are her more closely. “Have you finally gone mad?”

Hermione rolls her eyes. “Oh honestly Malfoy, when someone pays you a compliment you’re supposed to say thank you, not question their sanity.”

This earns her a brief, small smile from Malfoy. So small, in fact, that if she had blinked she would have missed it. “Thank you? Although, I’m not sure they come in your size.”

Hermione feels her face flush in embarrassment. 

When he turns to leave once again, Hermione feels a tiny bit better about letting him go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really glad that people are enjoying this story so far! It makes me happy that I can share my very self-indulgent writing with you.


	4. Chapter 4

Draco Malfoy is at breakfast the next morning and Hermione is so shocked she freezes by the door and just looks at him. He hadn’t been there before. From what she remembered she wouldn’t see him again until the end of the week. But there he is now, sitting with some other Slytherins and reading the Daily Prophet.

He doesn’t look like he’s eating anything, but him just _being_ there makes Hermione’s chest fill with hope. Maybe she can actually do this.

“Earth to Hermione, you there?” Ginny says from a couple feet in front of her.

“Oh yeah…” Hermione smiles at the other girl. “Sorry Gin, what were you saying?” 

Ginny rolls her eyes and leads them further down the table. She then tells her about her classes yesterday. Hermione tries to listen as best she can, but she can't help but sneak glances at the Slytherin table.

She has a free period so as soon as the bell rings to signal the end of breakfast, she makes her way to the library to start on some of her assignments. 

When she gets there, she greets Madam Pince as she always does and goes to sit in a table near the back.

She feels a bit guilty that she has already done most of these assignments before and was now only rewriting what she remembers writing, but it’s gone in an instant when she reminds herself that she did put in the work.

At Lunch Malfoy isn’t there but she tells herself not to worry. He was fine this morning and he was fine now. She has to believe that to get the food down.

Harry and Ron are telling her about something, but Hermione isn’t really listening. She’d feel bad if it wasn’t for a good reason.

“Don’t you think so Hermione?”

She startles back to reality when she hears her name. “What was that, Harry?”

“You okay? You’re kinda out of it,” Rons says between a mouthful of his food.

Hermione grimaces. “Honestly Ron, that’s disgusting.”

Ron doesn’t bother looking sheepish. “You gotta be used to it by now, Hermione.”

Hermione grimaces again but says nothing. She was still a bit upset about what he said to her the day before.

“I just wanted to hear your opinion about Ron’s chances to join the quidditch team?”

Hermione looks at her food instead of looking at either of them. She wants to roll her eyes and maybe groan a little. She doesn’t want to talk about this. “I’m sure his chances are good.”

“Just good?” Ron asks.

“You know, I don’t know very much about quidditch.”

Ron turns to glare at her. “I just thought you would be a little more supportive, seeing as how we’re friends and all.” He quickly gathers his things and leaves the table.

“Ron-” Hermione starts, but Ron just keeps walking. 

“I better go after him,” Harry says, looking at his best friend's retreating back. He gives Hermione a sympathetic smile. “I’ll see you later, yeah?”

“Yeah.” Hermione is left alone at the table. She doesn’t remember what she had said before, but it hadn’t ended up like this before.

-

She hasn’t seen Malfoy all day. He hasn’t attended any of his classes and she was really starting to wonder where it is he went off to. There weren’t very many places one could get peace in Hogwarts on a school day, after all.

She’s walking toward her usual table in the library when she catches a glimpse of platinum blond hair. Hoping it’s Malfoy, she follows it.

To her luck, it is. He’s searching through a bookshelf when she approaches him.

“Hi,” She says softly. It startles Malfoy and he turns around quickly, hand gripping his wand. Hermione puts her hands up in surrender. “Merlin Malfoy, it’s just me.”

Malfoy’s grip on his wand weakens and he slowly drops his arm. “What are you doing sneaking up on people?”

Hermione rolls her eyes. “I was just going to say hi. You didn’t go to your classes today.”

Malfoy gives her a look she can't quite read before narrowing his eyes. “Keeping tabs on me now too, are you?”

Hermione feels bad, it was no secret that Harry liked to know what Malfoy was up to at all times. Harry didn't think Malfoy was trustworthy, said his father seemed too dark to be harmless, but Hermione didn’t share this thought.

“I was worried is all,” Hermione starts, but quickly adds something when she see’s Malfoy raise up his defenses again. “It’s our 6th year, we can’t be slacking off, not if we’re going to be Head Girl and Head Boy, respectively.”

Malfoy calms a little at her explanation, enough to rolls his eyes slowly. “As if I’d want to be Head boy, anyways.”

Hermione raises her bookbag higher onto her shoulder. “If it’s not you, then who would it be?”

“I don’t make it a hobby to keep tabs on my competition like you seem to do, Granger.”

Hermione scoffs and bumps into his shoulder gently. “As if you’re my competition.”

Malfoy eyes harden and his posture becomes rigid. “Right.”

Hermione panics for a second. “But that’s because we’re in our own leagues, nobody can beat us. There’s no competition because we’re both just good at everything, aren’t we?” She knows she’s rambling, but she can't help it. She wants that look gone. “I mean if you’re not Head boy then the person who would be chosen instead wouldn’t have been the best, right? They’d have been a second choice and that’s not really worth much.”

“Granger.”

“Yes?”

“Stop.”

Hermione pushes her hair behind her ear. “Okay.”

Malfoy sighs and his posture relaxes a bit. Hermione starts to feel better until she realizes that the cold Malfoy was replaced by someone who looked so worn out. “Merlin, I don’t remember you talking this much.”

Hermione’s face reddens. “I’ve always talked this much.”

Malfoy starts to look for his book again. “Not to me, you haven’t.”

Hermione pauses at that. It was true that her and Malfoy had never really had a conversation beforehand, but surely it wasn’t so weird that she was speaking to him now?

“Why are you talking to me anyways, don’t you have a Weasley to bother?” He asks offhandedly.

“Is it so wrong that I want to speak to you?” Hermione asks.

“Yes.”

Hermione rolls her eyes. “I’m going to go study now.” Malfoy’s eyes seem to empty at her words. “You should come, you missed quite a bit today.”

Malfoy hesitates but eventually follows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't sure how I was going to go about writing Draco in a world with no war, but I think it's going to be a Draco that is tired of being hated and is just really confused that Hermione is being nice to him.


	5. Chapter 5

Hermione chooses the table they had sat on the other day. She’s taking her stuff out when Malfoy finally sits. 

Hermione smiles. “Okay, so I think you should start with Transfiguration, we had quite the lecture today.”

Malfoy rolls his eyes. “I can study on my own. You may not be used to it, considering who you keep as company but, I’m not incompetent.”

“You know, there’s nothing wrong with needing help.”

Malfoy looks at her. “I don’t need help. I can do this on my own.”

Hermione has a feeling he’s not only referring to his homework. “Perhaps, but that doesn’t mean you have to.”

“Are you offering to help me?” He seems almost angry at that.

Hermione ignores his glare and opens her book calmly. “All I’m saying is that if you ever need a bit of assistance you can ask me.”

“On assignments.”

Hermione looks up and gives him another smile. “Of course, on assignments.”

Malfoy pushes his bangs out of his face. “Don’t you have enough on your plate without needing to babysit me?”

Hermione kicks his leg gently under the table. “You’re not a child Malfoy, I’m not babysitting you. Besides, I enjoy studying with you.”

“What?”

“Oh don’t give me that look,” Hermione says. “Studying by myself is fine, but sometimes studying with another person is also good. You’re quiet and don’t try to look over at my paper for the answers. It’s nice.”

“You have very low standards in study partners.”

“With the options I have, I can’t afford to be picky.”

Malfoy smirks softly. “I suppose not.”

They stay like that for a while, quietly reading to themselves, but after a while Hermione can tell that Malfoy is no longer absorbing the words. He doesn’t seem to have moved from the same page in a couple of minutes.

Hermione groans and stretches her limbs. “I think I need a break.”

When Malfoy doesn’t respond, Hermione begins to worry.

“Malfoy.” She says. “Hey.”

Malfoy finally hears her. “Hmm?”

“Are you hungry?” Hermione asks when he finally looks at him. “I could use a snack.”

Malfoy goes back to his book. “I’m not hungry.”

Hermione is worried. She hasn’t seen Malofy eat anything since they arrived at Hogwarts. She wonders if he has eaten anything at all. “I really enjoyed dinner last night, delicious wasn't it?”

“Of course you would call the trash they feed us delicious.”

“Even you can’t call our food trash.”

Malfoy still doesn’t look at her. “It gets the job done.”

Hermione cocks an eyebrow. “And what job is that?”

“It keeps us fed.”

“Does it keep you fed?”

Malfoy looks at her then. “Of course.”

Hermione holds his stare, Malfoy is the first to look away. “That’s good then," she replies.

They spend the rest of the time reading, but Hermione can tell that Malfoy is eager to escape. As soon as the bell rings to signal the end of the first period, he bolts from his chair. 

Hermione wants to follow him but she also has to go to class. She has thought about skipping, but changing the future purposely with Malfoy was bad enough, she didn’t want to change more.

All throughout her lessons she ignores the voice in her head that tells her she should have gone after him.

He’s not at lunch, but she doesn’t let herself worry too much. He wasn’t going to meals, but that didn’t mean he was in danger. She would see him soon, she knew she would.

Except a week passes and Hermione doesn't see him once. She tries looking for him in the library where she has seen him before, but she finds nothing. She wants to ask his house mates if they know where he is, but when she approaches Pansy, the girl just glares and walks past her without a word.

Hermione is worried. She has altered the future already by having him show up at breakfast a week before and talking to him in the library, she's afraid that perhaps the events were sped up and Draco was laying in the tub, dead again. She’s been anxious for sometime now and it doesn’t escape her friends.

"Chew on your lip anymore and you'll draw blood."

In response, Hermione lets her bottom lip go. "Sorry."

"Are you alright? You’ve been on edge for a couple of days now."

"Oh... yeah, just lots of homework to do. I'm afraid I underestimated how much work we'd have this year, but I'm sure I'll be fine."

Ginny looks at her for a moment longer, but sighs and let's it go. "I get that you're going to be taking your Owls this year, but there are bigger things to worry about in life."

Hermione wants to laugh. Ginny is right about that.

-

She’s getting desperate, she can tell. She’s not blind to the fact that she’s frantically looking for a sign of platinum blond hair. But no matter how hard she looks, she can’t find it. She’s so desperate, in fact, that she finds her way to the dungeons before she notices where she is.

She doesn’t know what to do. It’s not like she has the password to get in, but what else was she supposed to do? She was brought back for the sole reason of keeping him from harm and she doesn’t even know where he is.

"Ganger? What are you doing here?"

Hermione turns to see Zabini walking toward her.

She brightens at his appearance and if it weird's him out, he doesn't show it. “Zabini, have you seen Malfoy?"

Zabini looks at her. She thinks he’s not going to talk, but he does. "Now that you mention it, he locked himself in his room a couple of days ago. He's refused to come out."

Hermione feels her stomach drop. "And... have you talked to him?"

Zabini gives her a hard stare. "If by talking you mean I’ve yelled at his door with no response then yes, we’ve talked."

"Can I try talking to him?"

Zabini sighs but walks toward the door. "Be my guest. Maybe you'll be able to talk some sense into him."

She hears Zabini whisper something and the doors open. Zabini gestures for her to go in and she does. He leads her through the common room, ignoring everyone's stares and whispers.

They go to the end of a hall and Zabini point to a door. “That’s his room.” 

Hermione steels herself, of course he has his own room, she isn't sure if that's a good or bad thing. She walks toward Draco’s door and knocks.

"Malfoy?" She speaks gently. "Are you in there?"

She hears nothing and feels her panic rise again.

"Malfoy, answer me," this time with a little more conviction.

"Go away Granger." Comes a soft voice from the other side.

The panic is gone and is replaced by relief.

"Malfoy, I just wanted to make sure you were okay," she can feel Zabini’s eyes on her and she flushes slightly. "Erm McGonagall was worried when you started missing so many classes."

"I’m fine, now go away.”

Hermione isn't going to leave without seeing him. “Malfoy, open the door.”

“No.”

“Mate, don’t be a prick, just open the door.”

She hears something break behind the door and flinches.

“Go the fuck away,” his voice is muffled but she can tell he’s breathing heavy now. “Both of you, fuck off.”

Hermione turns to Zabini. “May I speak to him alone?”

Zabini raises an eyebrow but nods. “Fine.”

She waits until she can no longer hear his footsteps before speaking again.

“Malfoy, are you alright?”

“I’m fucking peachy.”

“Then why won’t you open the door?”

She can hear him moving around. “And see your ugly mug, not likely.”

Hermione feels hurt, but she doesn’t let it get to her. She would deal with her feelings another time. “Open the door-”

“No-”

“Open the door before I blast it open.”

Malfoy stays silent. A few minutes pass and Hermione is about to raise her wand, when she hears a soft click. The door opens a crack and she pushes it open slowly. The room is a mess. The furniture is upturned and everywhere, there are books and clothing littered all throughout the floor, pieces of parchment on his bed and as she looks closer some shards of glass and specks of blood on the way toward what looks to be his private bath.

Malfoy, himself, is curled up in his bed, facing away from her. 

She walks slowly, avoiding the mess on the floor, and sits on the edge of his bed.

“Hey,” she says softly. “Are you alright?”

Malfoy starts to chuckle humorously, but ends up choking on a sob. “Look around you, obviously I’m fine.”

Hermione’s heart breaks for him all over again. “Malfoy, what happened?”

He curls into himself further. “Nothing,” comes his muffled response.

She looks around at the pieces of parchment on his bed and see’s that they’re letters. The papers are charred, as if Draco had burned them, but the seal on the envelope is easily recognizable. The Malfoy family crest stands bright against the burnt paper. 

“Your family… are they okay?” Hermione asks.

“Oh they’re just fine.”

Hermione doesn’t know what to say. She had no idea what has caused him to go into this state. She’s looking for something to say when she hears a rumbling noise. 

“Are you hungry?”

Draco buries his face into his pillow. “No.”

Hermione sighs and moves to set her bag down. She reaches into it and pulls out an apple. “I think your body disagrees with you. Here.”

Draco slowly lifts his head and turns to see her outstretched hand. His stomach grumbles again and he glares at it as if it has betrayed him. He takes the apple from her and bites into it.

Taking a closer look at him, he seems worse than before. His hair is a mess, his eyes are bloodshot, and his face is covered in a light dusting of hair. She wonders when he has last taken a shower, but she figures she should get him to eat something before she attempts to groom him.

He finishes the apple quickly and tosses the core somewhere on the floor, before resuming his curled up position. Hermione scrunches up her nose but doesn’t comment.

“You’re not going to get up then?”

“No.”

Hermione crosses her arms. “I’m not leaving until you get out of bed and take a shower.”

“Well then, you better get comfortable because I'm not moving.”


	6. Chapter 6

“I’m serious, Malfoy,” Hermione says.

“So am I,” Draco replies. “The only way I’m getting out of bed is if you drag me out.”

“Is that so,” Hermione says raising an eyebrow . “ Well then perhaps I’ll do just that.”

Draco raises his head to look at her. “You wouldn’t dare.”

Hermione smirks. “You sure about that?” They stare at each other, Draco narrowing his eyes even more every time Hermione’s smirk grows.

She moves to grab his feet and his eyes widen. 

“Wait, no-” but it’s too late, Hermione grabs him and literally pulls him out of bed. He falls with a hard thump and groans.

“You foul witch, that hurt.”

Hermione starts laughing but when she see’s the cuts on his arms, she stops.

“What is wrong with you? Your moods change faster than my mum's wardrobe,” Draco says, rubbing his head.

Hermione shakes her head. “Let’s go run you a bath.”

Draco is serious about not wanting to get up. It takes a threat of levitation to get him to go into the bathroom and in the water. 

She’s sitting outside his bathroom door and waiting for him to finish but, when 15 minutes go by and she hasn’t heard movement for a while, she can’t help but worry.

“Malfoy, you alright in there?”

She hears a muffled response but she can't make out the words.

“Come again?” 

Another muffled response just makes her annoyed.

“Malfoy, I’m coming in.” She opens the door and sees Draco leaning against the inside of the tub with his arms crossed, head laying on top of them.

“Hey,” she says and she walks toward the tub. “You alright?”

“Hmm?” Draco says, looking up at her briefly. “Oh, oh yeah, I’m good.”

Hermione hesitates but goes to sit against the side of the tub. She doesn’t know what to say to him. One minute he’s his regular snarky self and the next he’s this. This closed off, glassy eyed shell of a person and to be honest, this Draco scares her. Scares her because this Draco Malfoy looks done with everything, looks far away, and she’s afraid she won’t be able to reach him in time.

“Are you done with your bath?”

“Almost.”

“Okay.”

They sit there for a while, just staring at the walls. 

“Hey,” Draco says.

Hermione turns to look at him. “Yeah?”

Draco isn’t looking at her. “Why did you come here?”

Hermione sees images of his memorial and the lack of students, feels the pain she felt during all the apathy of the student body and the guilt that was left over. “I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

He hums. “Why?”

Hermione wants to tell him that someone has to, but considering they weren’t friends it almost seems cruel. “I just wanted to.”

Whether or not that was a good answer, Draco accepts it.

“I think I’m done now.”

“Okay,” Hermione says, getting up. “I’ll wait outside.”

When Draco comes out of the bathroom he once again drops himself onto his bed.

Hermione doesn’t know what to do. She doesn’t want to say the wrong thing. She goes to sit at the side of his bed again.

“When I was younger,” Hermione says softly. “My mother used to tell me stories about birds.”

She waits a while before continuing. “For so long I loved birds. I was a bit enthralled by how free they were. I didn’t grow up knowing about magic so to me, flying was just as magical as real life could be.”

“But you don’t like flying,” Draco mutters. It was no surprise to the student body that Hermione would not go near a broom.

“I know,” Hermione smiles sadly.. “I hate it. I never realized how terrified I was of heights. I guess…” she pauses again. “I’m a bit disappointed that I can’t like it.”

“That sucks,” Draco replies dejectedly.

Hermione sighs. “Perhaps, but I’ve learned so many other things that are just as amazing as the thought of flying. You love flying don’t you?”

Draco doesn’t say anything for a while and Hermione doesn’t want to push him so she stays quiet also.

“Yes,” He says finally. “I love it.”

Hermione's smiles. “What do you love about it?”

“Everything,” He mutters. “How fast I can go, the wind blowing past me, it’s amazing. I just love being...”

“Free,” Hermione finishes for him. He looks up at her and nods.

“It’s the best thing about being a wizard.”

Hermione doesn’t want to ruin this moment but something has been nagging at her for a while.

“If you love flying so much, why didn’t you join the Quidditch team this year?”

Draco sighs wearily. “It’s because I love it so much that I didn’t join.” Hermione could understand that. As much as Draco clearly loved flying, that didn’t mean he loved Quidditch just as much. 

Hermione should have understood this before. He didn’t want the competition and expectations to ruin one of the only things he loved.

“That makes sense,” Hermione tells him.

Draco curls up further into himself. “I’m going to sleep now.”

Hermione doesn’t want to leave but she doesn’t have a reason she could use to stay. She sighs and picks up her bag. “I’ll see you a breakfast tomorrow?”

He mutters something.

“Come again?”

“Yeah…”

Hermione nods. “I’ll keep you to that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been so busy with school and work that I didn't have time to write anything! I'm so sorry! Winter break is coming soon so I can finally work on some of my other stories too but for now enjoy this short chapter hahah ha
> 
> (Also as a side note, I was inspired by another fic for the flying/bird story Hermione tells but I can't for the life of me find which fic it was ahhhh)


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